This past Friday, I pulled myself out of bed in the wee hours of the morning and got into my little car, headed for South Carolina to support Hillary Clinton in the primary there. My traveling companion was a 50 year old Ethiopian woman who has lived in D.C. for over 30 years. As we drove South, we talked about the election and she had some very pointed things to say, observations, about African-Americans who all of a sudden find the Clintons deplorable, even though less than 10 years ago the great majority of them were ready to spit fire on behalf of Bill Clinton when the Monica Lewinsky drama was unfolding. While I thought that what she was saying made some sense, I still wasn't quite ready to agree with all of her observations, preferring to just go with the notion that many of them just wanted the chance to see an African-American in the White House. Not necessarily that they now hated the Clintons. Boy was I in for a surprise when I hit the ground in South Carolina, my birth state, on Saturday morning. A surprise that had one horrible caveat that makes me sad and ashamed of how people who have been discriminated against on the basis of race for so long are now perpetrating that same injustice.
When I arrived in South Carolina on Friday, I headed straight for the Clinton headquarters in Columbia. I was very pleased to see a wonderful mixture of people of all races, sexes and ages, including some of South Carolina's most powerful Black congressional leaders, preparing for the big day on Saturday. The mood was not frantic, but rather steady and calm as most of us discussed the fact that she would probably lose the state, it was just a matter of by how much. I, the eternal optimist, despite the odds, had hoped that she might be able to pull off a major upset...the people of South Carolina had other plans. That evening, I drove to Charleston, South Carolina with three women to attend the Clinton rally there. I'm so glad I did as I was able to shake both her and Bill's hands and she signed my rally poster. That alone made the whole trip worth it a thousand times over. At the rally, Hillary was electrifying and had a command of the audience that was breathtaking to witness. When she mentioned her plan for Universal Healthcare, and how everyone in the room probably knew someone who didn't have health insurance, a Black guy who looked to be in his early 20's yelled out, "I don't have health insurance!" The room went crazy as Hillary assured him that once she's Commander in Chief, he wouldn't have to worry about that anymore.
On Saturday morning, I headed to Sumter, South Carolina with two fellow Hillary supporters to help out in the office there. When we arrived, it was decided that our biracial friend had better stay at the office and make calls because things might get a little "tense" at times and the voters might receive me and the other supporter better. I thought this was strange, but figured that it wasn't my decision to make and I didn't know the area well enough to resist, so we headed out to distribute flyers and other information, canvassing various parts of the community to show our support for Hillary. The hatred which we were met by shocks me still at this very minute.
Countless times, cars and minivans pulled up in front of us, rolled down their windows and asked, "Why are ya'll out here holding up these signs for this white woman?" The first few times, we tried to laugh it off and make light of it, but as the day wore on the comments got more and more harsh and more and more frequent. The pattern was set and the reality was blinding. People pulled up, rolled their windows down and shook their heads, then proceeded to tell us we didn't have any business supporting "some white woman" and how we should be supporting Obama. None of them with reasons other than the fact that he is Black. People drove by and yelled at us and just about everything in between.
But, the thing that put the period behind the sentence was a minivan filled with a woman, the driver, who might have been in her mid 60's, a passenger to the right of her who might have been in her 80's, a man sitting in the passenger seat behind the elderly lady in the front, who might have been in his mid 60's and an elderly lady who was probably in her 80's to the left of him. They pulled up and the driver proceeds to scream, "Ya'll SHOULD NOT be out here trying to get people to vote for this white woman!! Barack Obama is a Black man and that's who ya'll should be out here supporting!!" At the same time, the man in his 60's was also yelling at us, only he was holding a megaphone even though their van was a mere 4 feet in front of us. He yelled, "Bill Clinton got ya'll out here like some prostitutes on a corner!" among many, many other reasons why he thought we were wrong for supporting Hillary. So, as the woman continued to yell about the horror of us supporting "this white woman" I had finally had it. I told her, "Ma'am, we really don't need to bring race into this. Besides, Barack Obama is half white and was raised by white people all of his life, so why would you..." She screamed at the top of her lungs, "THAT'S A LIE! And, ain't nobody told you that but some old ignorant nigga preacher!!!" and they drove off. The two elderly ladies never did say anything.
As I took stock of my experiences for the day, in my birth state, talking with and being confronted by fellow African-Americans with vile words and actions, it hit me that so many have become blinded by their desire to have an African-American in the White House, they have crossed over into a very dark place in the recesses of America's fabric. They have crossed over into a place that suggests "supporting your own" no matter the circumstances. A place that suggests that anyone who doesn't support their own no matter the circumstances is a "race traitor". A place that suggests that a person shouldn't be treated fairly if their race goes against the grain. A place that I never thought my people would go after suffering so horribly for hundreds of years under the roof of "this place".
Each of us could probably list a dozen times when we've witnessed a more qualified black person passed over for a job or other opportunity which was subsequently given to a less qualified white person simply because somebody was "supporting their own". That's why affirmative action was instituted--to attempt to assuage those situations. It's not right when it's done to African-Americans, and it's not right when it's done to anyone of any other race. We've all been hearing the comments and speculation about how race may not be an issue in this country anymore because it seemed as if whites have been willing to vote for Obama (at least they were in large numbers as of a few weeks ago. Now? Not so much. More on that in a few days.). I listened with baited breath as pundits rattled on with their absurd suggestions. As a black woman, I'm confronted with racism or bigotry every single week. So, I don't even buy into that ridiculousness. Now, ashamedly, it's some of my own people, in great numbers, who have joined the party and now share the task of dishing out hate, using the same tone and words as the bigots and racists of yesteryear.
It's one thing to vote for Barack Obama because you believe in what he stands for, but it's quite another to say, "I'm voting for the brother, not some white woman," with nary a consideration for who really is the most qualified for the job. I'm glad I did decide to got to Sumter on Saturday instead of staying in Columbia because I was afforded the opportunity to really face the reality of much of Black America's decision to support Obama. If I had stayed in Columbia, I'm sure I would have primarily seen the surface reasoning for supporting him. "He's going to change the country and bring hope"--but away from the cameras and the crowds, total strangers felt comfortable and appeared to think it was their duty to tell me one on one why I was a fool for supporting "some white woman". Much in the same way whites who joined the civil rights struggle were met with backlash from their people for helping "these niggers". People who no doubt, and history shows, were ridiculed, threatened, assaulted and even killed for standing up for what was right. Racial hatred is never an across the board proposition. Certainly, just the same as not all white people hated blacks way back then, not all blacks are voting for Obama just on the basis of race. But, hatred and bigotry is a powerfully deteriorating driving force and if even a simple majority of black voters are voting on the basis of race and race alone, before those who aren't simply voting on that basis will know what hit them, the bigots will have taken center stage. It's already happening.
Last night, when I checked my email, after 10 hours of being called a fool for supporting, "some white woman" on Saturday, I was slapped once again by one of my sorority sisters who had taken the time to create a flyer that said that any black person who doesn't support Barack Obama can forget about her supporting anything that their "black children or black grandchildren" are going to do. The flyer rattles on about how "your children live in the same house as you and if you don't vote for a "good black person" your children won't know when to do so either", "PRESIDENT Obama is a gift from God to the world!!!" and "This Black division WILL END in 2008". It comes complete with photographs of black people engaged in various events like graduations, birthday parties, weddings, etc. accept for my sorority sister had taken the time to put the universal sign for "no" or "ban", the circle with the slash across the middle, on every picture to drive the point home that she will not be supporting anything we do if don't vote for Obama. I was floored, but hoped that maybe she had just gotten a little fired up so close to the election, but that she would calm down in the coming days...only to open the next email from her and find a picture of her six month old baby sitting on a sofa surrounded by dozens and dozens of envelopes stuffed with this flyer in preparation for her to mail them off to I'm guessing friends and family. This flyer was supposed to be showing how her baby, even at such a young age, is already involved in the political process. I thought it was just as blood chilling as pictures of little blond-headed white girls wearing swastika covered shirts and holding out their arms to show that they too believe Hitler was right as their parents made them smile for the camera. I simply responded to the email with, "Wow.........."
I'm sure some of you, who have taken the time to read this probably far too long diatribe, are angry with me right now. But, the reality of the matter is this, if none of us had ever seen or heard Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama, didn't know anything about them, and they were simply labeled as Candidate A and Candidate B, and their qualifications, experiences and plans were listed underneath their "names", Hillary Clinton would beat Barack Obama every, single time. I'm not voting for Hillary because I don't have pride in my race and that's a ridiculous and foolish thing to assert. We are all Democrats. It's not as if I'm out there touting Ann Coulter as my candidate of choice. I'm voting for Hillary Clinton for two reasons. One, she's the best prepared and experienced for the job and two, she's the only one who can truly beat the Republicans, thus the reason why their candidates are focusing primarily on trying to knock her out of the running. They don't even consider Obama a threat. You can deny it all you want, but it's the reality. They aren't ramping up efforts to beat back Obama, they are ramping up efforts to beat Hillary because they know what's coming.
As I traveled around parts of Sumter on Saturday, I was met by two stark realities that left me feeling more drained than I could have ever imagined. The reality of racism among my own, and the reality of just how far black women still have to go. Countless women told us that they wouldn't vote for Hillary Clinton because it was too tough of a job for a woman to do because her emotions would get in the way, countless men told us the same thing. I thought to myself, as black people, we've already got to work that much harder to prove our worth in many situations, but even in 2008 we can still tell our little black girls that they will never be able to grow up to be whatever they want to be, simply because they are girls. --SUGAR
The debate tonight was very civil, despite the fact newshounds had their fangs showing ready to gnaw into every little nugget of detail regarding both candidates. I think that Hillary Clinton once again got in an awesome slam dunk when she responded to the truly silly question about the Bush-Clinton "dynasty" by saying that it took a Clinton to clean up after the first Bush and it will take another Clinton to clean up after the current Bush. My phone started ringing INSTANTLY! 
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